so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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