he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
