a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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