i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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