Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
