thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
