It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
