Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
