I heard we made out
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
