We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
it was like eating out sand paper
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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