How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
