there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
