i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
