My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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