How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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