let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
