so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
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