Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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