I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
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