so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
