is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
how can u be prego again
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
