She said her name was "party"
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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