I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
