oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
