Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
