Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
