If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
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