is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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