Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
No subtext here. People are naked.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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