The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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