Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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