Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
