Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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