She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize