Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize