She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I know her cup size but not her name....
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize