hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
