there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
