Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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