Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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