2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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