its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
