I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize