Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
