She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
