I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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