I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize