Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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