i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
