and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
